Thank you for stopping by my corner of the Internet. I haven’t occupied a space here in cyperspace for a few years now. I used to run an Etsy business along with a blog, called My Little Chickadee Creations. It was my baby conceived by accident (what can I say but it happens). My blog was more a space for promoting what I did (I transformed travertine tiles into home decor pieces like coasters and trivets) and promoting other handmade shops out in Etsy land.
My life has been a whirlwind over the past 14 years. I became a work-at-home mom of two boys running a full-time business, to becoming a full-time college student completing a bachelor’s degree and now I’m a graduate student working to earn a Master’s degree in creative writing. My first class begins on September 14 (woohoo!).
Why writing? I was a young girl who loved to read Anne of Green Gables, Little Women, Nancy Drew, and dreamed of moving to New York City to be an editor and eventually an author. So in the 1990’s, I went to college, majoring in English. I took creative writing classes and found myself scared to share my work in the writer’s workshop classes. I found everyone else brilliant and myself boring. My mother would remind me “Ellen, people only major in English when they don’t know what they want to do.” I was confused. I was an assistant editor at my college newspaper and everyone else majored in English. I panicked. I switched my major to elementary education (but I didn’t want to teach little kids) to occupational therapy (that seems interesting and practical) and then left after 2 years of majoring in how-to switch majors.
I didn’t have the self-confidence to continue on at college because I was consumed with worrying about other’s opinions on what I should do with my life. In order to cope with this situation, I moved 3 hours away, married a person I shouldn’t have and barely talked to my mom. (WARNING: Don’t do what I did. Running away does not solve anything, just prolongs the inevitable).
I was a 32-year old pushing the reset button on my life. I moved to a new city, met my now-husband and we started a family, having 2 boys within 3 years. It was my dream come true. I wanted a family. I was fortunate to start a craft business I could run from my home and be with my kids full-time.
Now those babies are 14 and 12 years old. About 4 years ago, I ended my Etsy business and decided to fix that regret of leaving college. Thankfully I was able to use my credits from 20 years prior so I was able to finish my bachelor’s degree in 2 years but I still played it safe. I majored in technical communications, thinking that was a more practical skill than my buried passion for creative writing.
I’ve always written privately for my eyes only in journals, notebooks, and various word documents over the years. Being a writer felt like this title that I couldn’t actually obtain, that a person like me (whatever that means) could never be a published writer.
So I completed my bachelor’s degree in 2019 and again felt lost. I had a job I didn’t really enjoy but for a company that treats it’s employees quite well. I was able to work from home, received great benefits and loved my co-workers.
Then 2020. The year when life stopped. Suddenly my busy, chaotic life evolving around 2 middle-school boys came to a standstill. The kids were home distance learning. No more sports. No more band. No more after-school activities. I had more time. I felt my inner voice urging me on, “it’s time. Don’t waste any more years on not getting published”
I started writing every day. I started taking online creative writing classes through Gotham Writers in New York City and The Loft in Minneapolis. I felt alive again.
Over the past few years, I’ve felt lost as the focus of my life has pivoted from being a full-time mom to a part-time mom to a do-they-know-I-exist mom.
I decided to leap.
I’m enrolled at the Master’s of Arts in Creative Writing graduate program at Southern New Hampshire Univerity. Yes I know you don’t need a degree to be a published writer but I also want to teach at some point down the road. I would love to work with teenagers to help them find their own voice and that confidence to be the writer they envision themselves to be. I wish I would have that type of person in my life when I was a teenager. I think my journey would have looked a little different.
Photo by Timothy Paul Smith on Unsplash
One thought on “Full Circle”
Better late, than never.
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